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Gay Peoples Chronicle

October 1986

THE HIT BUDDIES PROGRAM

INTERVIEW WITH

MARK LEHMAN & BILL MCCAFFERY

McCaffery: The Buddies Program is part of the Support Committee of the Health Issues Taskforce. Mark is the Chairman of the Support Committee, and I'm in charge of the individual Buddies. I can give information about the Buddies program in general, and Mark will provide information about the Support Committee.

The Buddies program has really been providing services here in town for about three months. As of now, October 22nd, we have 14 volunteers who are working as Buddies or have worked as such.

We recently finished our first Buddies training session, where we trained 19 volunteers. In the sessions we try to teach volunteers to provide individual support for people with AIDS. We try to make them knowledgeable and empathetic. The training takes an entire weekend: Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. We try to cover the medical, nursing, and psychosocial aspects of AIDS, with talks by professionals; a multi-media approach using films, slides, and written materials; plus lectures and small-group activities. So it's pretty varied training.

Because of the great need for Buddies here, we'll be using all our existing volunteers by the end of October. That's what we're projecting. So we're planning a second training--a Buddies II, if you will--for November 14 through 16.

We're hoping that some people reading this interview who would like to do something will realize that this is something they do, something that won't intimidate them.

can

A lot of people probably think, "I'm not medically oriented I'm not a thera-

I'm just an average

gist well, average Joes can

be excellent Buddies. What they need is a little background to know what to

expect in dealing with someone with this awful illness; and to realize that they are not going into this alone, that there's an in-place support group for them. We provide these.

Sunday morning Ted Wilson, a worker at University Hospitals, led univeunda

table discussion with three people with AIDS. All three had very different backgrounds. One was married, with children. One was from Europe, and the disease expressed itself there. The third was a middle-aged black man. The one thing that came out with these three very diverse men was that they really weren't much different from the volunteers. One volunteer said, "You know, we really are

not

just like you." So it's like: You're the small

group and the rest of us are taking care of you. Because we aren't that different.

All the volunteers' experiences have been very, very positive. People are saying they're really glad they did this. Someone whom I just Buddied up over the weekend weally served a need thrilled. He said,

"This

The number of AIDS cases here is increasing. People assumed PWA's were coming back to Cleveland because it's such a strong family town; that they were returning to family and friends. But that's not necessarily the case. A lot of them moved away from their families years ago and are coming back to elderly parents or to their siblings. Many of them have lost touch with their friends. On paper they seem to have a support

BILL MCCAFFERY

system. But in reality, many don't have someone they can relate to on a personal basis. And that's where the Buddies are so important.

Even PWAS with an ideal support system--a good family and a lover--really appreciate an outsider they feel they don't have to depend on: somebody who knows the story, who can just come in, and whom they can be very honest with. They need somebody to whom they can just say "Look, I feel like shit. They can't say this to their parents or their friends, or people who are taking care of them. Buddies are ideal persons for that sort of thing.

Lehman: Also, the Buddies aren't therapists or social workers, or someone you have to look good in front of. PWAS can just kind of be themselves. Sometimes it's nice to have a person you can relate to on that level, without always looking for the right thing to say or the right answer, or trying to sound like you're okay when you're not. That's very important.

Callender: I heard some

months ago, when the program was being set up, that most PWAS here didn't want help. Has that changed, then?

Leh: That came from a statement by Ted Wilson, Ellen Coleman, Jane McIntyre, John Sharp, and me, the social workers here who had most of the PWA cases. None of those we worked with really expressed any interest in Buddies. They had family to turn to or friends who became their Buddies in a sense. We kept hearing this, over and over.

Then we instituted this program. For some reason-either people caught wind of it, or thought they could turn to it as reliable--the requests are coming in now.

McC: I think it's because DOW we actually have something to offer. Before, it was: We don't have anybody, but would you like a Buddy if we could get you one? Who's going to say yes? Now we can say: We have trained Buddies and this is what's available.

We try to make as compatible a match as possible between PWA and volunteer. We sit down with the PWA and ask what kind of volunteer he'd feel most comfortable with. Some say they would be comfortable with a straight woman, or a black, or a

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